“To enjoy good health, to bring true happiness to one’s family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one’s own mind. If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him.-Buddha

I’ve written about control before, it’s one of those things that pops up in many places only in different clothes. The less we’re attracted to what we think we can gain by using it, and the more we about face when we feel the essence of it being used upon us, the better whatever life equation we happen to be dealing with at the time will be. Buddha’s quote is about controlling our own mind and finding enlightenment…the key is control over ourselves, that’s different than asserting ourselves on others.

Stop right now and ask yourself who YOU may be applying control over to get something done? We’re not talking within a discussion where we are trading or figuring out thoughts, or the plans and ideas for a project or a schedule where we’re hearing both sides and considering both sides. This isn’t control. Considering and listening to both sides isn’t control. I’m talking about that feeling of pushing and pushing. I’m taking about that over assertive, bull with the horns control. Do you have any of that going on right now in your life? This control tactic is something that is used so often in business. It has its place there, and it can work there. Your personal life is not your work life. The energy used is not worth the outcome, and the results achieved under controlled circumstances never feels any good. How about the other side? Have you felt controlled or bullied in your life? Is there someone who no matter what you say-says the opposite, just for the sake of saying it? You say yes, they say no? It’s not worth the energy nor repartee. There are those that are just into the back and forth. There are those who are just into being in control. It won’t matter what you say.

Either someone will see something from your point or view or they won’t. Life is not the High School Debate Team. Don’t waste your energy trying to convince someone who doesn’t want to see that side. As Kenny Rogers, said in the song The Gambler, “you’ve got to know when to fold”.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and comments.